I’m mostly posting this as a sort of anomaly, as I have no clue how seriously you can take something like this. It’s not so much that the idea of a fat camp for adults is too absurd (far from it), it’s just that reading this page is an exercise in craziness. Obviously translated into English by the only guy in the office that could halfway raise his hand when their boss asked who could speak it, reading through this is not only the most hilarious shit I’ve seen all week, it’s also the most endearing. Because not only is it terrible broken English, but the idea that this bare bones site is trying to convey is almost genius. Fake or not.:

Today’ function; adult center of the fields of the loss of weight of s in the treatment of the whole person something that accentuating the number in the scale. Its goal for the guests is finding a solution of long term for a problem of by life. They obtain this with the education of nutrition, the physical activity and the timidity.

It’s like we’re reading the Mona Lisa of broken English. Not only that, but once you cut through that craziness, you start to see their ideas. Who knew that “timidity” would help fat people lose weight? Is timidity even a word? Who cares, that’s awesome.  I soon expect to see it on Gatorade bottle nationwide; “Cool down your thirst with ELECTROLYTES, and our newly patented source of energy: TIMIDITY”.

So say this is all sounding good to you, and you’re fairly certain this isn’t some rapist operating out of the back of his shack in the deep south. How exactly is their program going to make you thin and beautiful?

They offer to its guests healthy options of the food with more reasonable a daily caloric restriction, provide with them a variety of physical activities such as yoga, training of the force, kayaking, and swimming, and help to determine them what emotional problems of the behavior and/or can be the underlying cause of their obesity.

Whoa, wait. Back up…

training of the force

Well shit. If I can be trained in the force, then I will go out of my way to gain at least 100 pounds to be part of your adult fat camp. Rape shack or not, if these shady fucks can teach me to toss a body 200 feet in the air with my mind, then sign me up.

Plan your stay right here.